I’ve long been aware that Google is…uh…hard to get a hold of. That is, if you have a question, they don’t really want to hear it — at least not directly. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but it’s hard to find the normal “Contact” link pretty much anywhere on their sites. No, they want you to dig through their many and varied forums first, to see if your particular question has been asked before.
If you find something that says “Help” you will be shunted to the “Help Center” that offers up the various forums where they intend for you to post your question. It doesn’t seem to matter to them that their forums are first of all difficult to locate, and then once you get there, they are virtually impenetrable and completely time-consuming to try to get your particular question answered. And complaints? Puhleeeze! You should be so lucky. Direct email contact? Mostly completely out of the question. Here’s what they say:
“Currently, we accept email reports for the issues below. In most cases, you won’t receive a personal response, but we do carefully review each report we receive.
For all other issues, please search the Help Center or ask for help in the Help Forum.”
Yep, that’s right, only specific, limited comments are allowed to be asked directly but this is strictly one-way communication. They come right out and say that “you won’t receive a personal response.”
In this context, I really don’t understand what meaning Google’s oft-quoted dictum “Don’t be evil” has. How could this not be evil? But they’re Google, which means by default they are widely viewed as “cool”. Well, forget it, Google, giving your users the finger is so not cool.
No related posts.
“Don’t be evil” isn’t the same thing as “Be nice”
I’ve explained the “don’t be evil” motto on my blog.. but since no one reads it, I’ll share it here:
I finally understand the mystery that is Google. It can be found by understanding the meaning behind their philosophy of Don’t Be Evil.
When Google space aliens came to Earth to conquer us, they made the same mistake so many space aliens had made before; they based their understanding of human society on transmissions they’d received from deep in space.
When Google space aliens arrived on Earth, they had no intention of not doing evil. The concepts of good or evil did not exist in their realm. Because they existed millions, even billions, of miles away in space, the Google space aliens didn’t come to Earth specifically to cause harm. They came in response to a message:
“You know I can be found,
Sitting home all alone,
If you can’t come around,
At least please telephone.
Don’t be cruel to a heart that’s true.”
“Don’t be cruel.” Words and music by Otis Blackwell. Sung by Elvis Presley.
The Google space aliens came here seeking Elvis. Due to a miscommunication caused by poor translation software available on the Internet at the time, their desire to locate the source of the song “Don’t be cruel” which they had been enjoying from deep space and whose lyrics beckoned them here, came out as the now famous Google motto: Don’t be evil. It was a simple mistake.
But when the Google space aliens arrived on Earth with their one goal of meeting Elvis, he was nowhere to be found. His song said he’d be home, sitting all alone. But when they looked, he wasn’t there. Sure, rumors circulated that he’d just been somewhere, and there’s even evidence that he’s everywhere. But he wasn’t home when the Google aliens checked.
Apparently, Elvis had left the building. The song says to call, but it doesn’t list a number.
Makes sense now, huh.
You don’t need to believe, but all the evidence is there. To facilitate their search for Elvis, they created the largest search tool ever known to mankind. Just read the Google corporate philosophy if you want more proof. Think of Elvis while you read, and it all makes sense.
With user population in the billions I think it’s a bit unrealistic to expect personal communication from Google. Yahoo is the same
It isn’t just Google. Try sending email to, oh, McAfee or UnitedHealthCare or…the examples could go on and on. (At least UHC has real people who actually answer the phone, not apparent bots who engage in online chat.)
I don’t buy Shane’s argument. Too many businesses with tens or hundreds of millions of customers *do* accept email, whether they respond immediately or not. And yes, it continues to amaze me that Google gets a pass on so much, either because of a silly slogan or because it used to be cool.
When is the last time you sent Google a check? There’s really no comparison to United Health Care or traditionally licensed software. Google’s services, after all, don’t cost anything out-of-pocket to use.
Given Google’s reliance on data analysis, I imagine they are more willing to upset a few Walts and Roys (you are closing your accounts, right?) and risk losing your business than run a more expensive customer support operation that most users/customers wouldn’t use or don’t want.
Ted – actually, Google just debited my credit card about a week ago, to pay for Adwords ads. So yes, I “send them a check” quite often. And given their lackluster customer service, I have no loyalty to them at all. This means when a competitor comes along I will have no incentive to remain. You would think that might be something they would care about, but apparently not.